The AEQ method has been a part of me for a quarter of my life. Those who have known me my whole life know best what exactly does it mean to me.
I got the chance to experience how low can someone who is disconnected from with himself fall – how hard it is when you can’t tell which voice inside you is the voice of ego and which voice is the one of heart, of your body. Specifically, when you can’t hear your body anymore, and all you can hear is your ego. Feelings and messages are coming up from your body but the mind does not detect them or refuses to detect them until the body suffers severe consequences such as pain or illness, and the mind starts sensing the ground beneath its feet only after falling from illusion to depression.
Ego wants power, validation, and dominance. The body needs tenderness, warmth, love, and safety… When these needs are unintentionally or unknowingly not answered (childhood), we experience some kind of pain. When this pain lasts for a long time or reoccurs, the child is forced to adjust because he has no other option since he is dependent on the parent. He suppresses the pain, he denies it, and it gets stored in his body – it seemingly has no influence, but in reality, it stays there and on a subconscious level influences every moment of his life. The mind doesn’t want to face her, because he will have to feel the pain that he couldn’t cope with in the past. Over the course of our lives, we increasingly get into situations where salt is put on our wounds. Ego denies our real condition and causes SMA, and puts on a mask on his face – the illusion – because the painful somatic state is his reality in the present, and the mask is just a product of him (the ego) acting under the influence of quantum physics. The one that is in the present always wins – and that is the body.
This way, there is an abyss between the body and the mind. The mind without the body is like a wander in the fog and the more it distorts it, the more of it there is. The mind without the body just overthinks things and never comes to a conclusion. Instead of a harmonious collaboration between the mind and body, a man becomes a stranger to himself. Instead of coming from himself and his feelings, he turns to his environment and hides his powerlessness.
Even as a little girl, I wondered about the meaning of life: why am I here, do we have to suffer, is life beautiful, what awaits me, is it up to me, is it all fate.
I was looking for answers at school and I decided to go to medical school because I wanted to help others. I started practicing athletics. Athletics has given me many nice things. I received width – I went far beyond my family’s trajectory. I was the kind of adolescent who would rather go to a bookstore than a clothing store. I wanted to patch the void inside me with successes at school and in sports but neither fulfilled that promise. The knowledge at school is very plastic and often not very consistent with the practice itself. I found it harder and harder to achieve medals and victories. It took me more and more effort to reach the same results. The more I achieved, the more I wanted and I was never really satisfied.
I was just a teenager when I was forced to deal with severe conditions: burnout, depression, Lyme disease, hormonal and immune break down, Chron’s disease and many others. It was hell. Not only I was on the floor, I was two feet below the ground. While the other teenagers enjoyed their lives, I was at rock bottom and I needed help.
The worst part was that the health system did not provide any effective care. After doing all the research possible and pumping liters of antibiotics into my veins, I remained sick and exhausted from all the symptoms that had worsened due to the side effects of the drugs.
Nor school, nor books, nor athletics gave me the answers to the questions I’ve been asking myself.
When I was ready, the teacher came. I met the AEQ method and got hope. I started active therapy and even though I did not understand it at first, I knew I’d get to the bottom of things eventually.
I was not even remotely aware of what was coming. In the first session, I couldn’t even tell how I felt, nor did I feel much. I couldn’t wait to go back to therapy because it calmed me down. Everything that was cooking inside me started coming up. I was like a pot and everything was boiling in me – only a very solid membrane could withstand such pressure. My body was one single spasm of hard and rigid muscles that had to be this way to be able to withstand all the pressure. I learned how to feel myself, I learned to express my feelings. So many painful insights and so much inauthenticity – playing a role of someone who I was not. So much self-denial. So wounded and so distrusting that I was destroying myself bit by bit. Slowly, my mind started coming back into my exhausted body – very slowly. It took years – 3 to 4 – for my organic systems to start working normally again. It took me many years to realize who I really am, and to learn to express myself, my desires, my needs, and my opinions.
My journey before AEQ was directed toward moving away from my essence, from myself, from my body and away from the painful truth. I was searching on the outside and denying my inside. I denied myself!
AEQ helped me to slowly come back to myself, into myself. I started coming back to the place where it’s warm, where you can be calm, where you can rest, where you don’t have to prove yourself. Journeying with the support of AEQ brought me back home. Not only I started feeling my body, I also changed my way of thinking, which I wasn’t even aware of before but still suffered badly from it. I had to change it, because otherwise I would end up…who knows where.
It is very difficult to build a foundation when the house is already there. But only good foundations are those that protect you from environmental impacts. It’s not fair to blame anyone because they all did their best and what they’ve learned from others. You always have to take full responsibility for yourself. You can’t change the past. You can only change the present to make a better future.
The human mind is so limited – it cannot sense the simple solutions that are not even connected to the material world. It is so nice to feel peace, love, and acceptance within yourself. When I watched Amy Winehouse’s documentary I saw and sensed so many similarities with my own life when I was at rock bottom. A few weeks before her death she said that all she wants is to walk down the street in peace.
There is nothing worse than a man not feeling peace within himself.
Self-destructive acts are the result of severe internal pain – exaggeration in food, sports, alcohol addiction, drugs, even exaggeration in work and exhausting yourself, just to escape and deny yourself.
I decided to study physiotherapy and soon realized that the facts that are supported by scientific research in regards to physical pain offer only a black-and-white film, while the AEQ method offers the whole color palette.
The AEQ method has put me back on my feet. I built my own foundations, I learned how to be myself, I now trust my feelings, and I live in a way that feels good. I feel like I’m getting younger. Of course, there are obligations and duties that I am more or less up to. I desire to share all the lessons I’ve learned over the years and will learn in the future.
We can no longer get past the fact that the influence of the modern way of life has distorted the basic life needs of people who are silently becoming slaves. I’ve experienced in my own life what’s missing in a man’s life who is driven by the apparent power of money, validation, victories or positioning. He lacks contact with his insides, which is painful or empty, and that is why he needs everything that can enrich him on the outside.
The answers and solutions to how to live and be free in one’s truth and make quality changes that improve the quality of well-being and life are in the body. AEQ offers the possibility that in today’s world, a world where we can no longer trust anyone, we can find trust in ourselves. There is nothing more important than standing firmly on your feet and building your own foundations that an ambiguous world cannot destroy. The AEQ method offers us the opportunity to raise awareness of what lies in the subconscious and change our thinking. There is no point in making excuses and making fate responsible. There is no point in suffering. We can take our lives into our own hands.
Those of us who got to know ourselves through the AEQ method, which stands on the physical laws that are part of our planet, we feel what great work can a man do for himself compared to all the modern approaches that our system offers. And what great work Aleš has done with his knowledge, instincts, and with linking truthful facts and integrating them in today’s modern way of life.
Mojca Centrih, Teacher of AEQ Method® Level 1