Hello Aleš,

I feel as if before the program, I was watching a horror movie from the couch. I was scared, but not really. Now I’ve realized that I’m the main character in that horror movie, and that it’s actually happening to me.

Even though I now have understanding and tools to help myself out, this realization—of everything that lies deep within me—shook me deeply. Nothing is new, I already knew it all, but now it’s much more intense and real. I can’t deny or escape it. It’s waiting for me to address it.

The deepest realization came during the program.

A sense of injustice I experienced from my family regarding how I was raised, compared to my sisters and nephews. A sharp pain moved from my broken heart into my gut and all the way to my bones.

After a few days, I felt as if something broke, cracked, and fell off me. A part of me has healed and I’m quite different than before. I’m much more compassionate and patient with myself. Kind and understanding. Because I now know what that little girl went through.

I am significantly calmer, even though I know I still have a lot of work to do. But this no longer pushes me into despair, rushing, or excessive effort.

This pain is completely different from the one felt when someone is in ignorance and denial of themselves.

This pain has an exit—it’s just a passage from the old to the new. It’s redemptive. It’s easier to bear because we have understanding.

Because we know it’s from the past. That we’ve brought it up so we can finally heal and release it.

At the same time, I became aware of how I continued this tradition of injustice myself—toward my younger son. Because he reminds me of my ex-husband and father. First, I sincerely apologized to him and stopped behaving that way. He also feels better, even though the road to forgiveness is still long.

It’s hard to look at my demons and dragons—especially because they’re not even mine. They were imposed on me by my parents and environment.

What helps me a lot in this transformation is that I no longer stay in touch with people who don’t respect me and who limit me.

During the program, I also realized that I don’t distinguish emotions from each other. Or rather, I don’t know how to express them.

That’s why I’m now making a list of emotions and their meanings. For example, what’s the difference between fury, wrath, and rage… I hope I’ll soon be able to attend the Level 2 seminar to gain additional knowledge about how emotions affect the body.

I also appreciate how often you repeat and explain the same things. Some of your sentences have really stuck with me, and when things get really hard, they help me endure and not give up.

Thank you, and best regards.